the ways i wanted her were innumerable.

the depths to which i felt her were unspeakable.

the things i wanted from her... indescribable.

because really, how do you say it?  how do you tell someone you love them so much you could die?  there aren't even words for the ways i loved her.  i could hardly bring myself to exhale because i wanted to do was continuously, fluently breathe her in.  it was like she didn't have enough skin to touch, like i couldn't kiss hard enough.  like i couldn't root myself as deep as deep as deep as i wanted to go.  i wanted to crawl into her bones and replace her marrow so every time her blood pumped it would be because of me.  i wasn't obsessed, i was consumed, and i wanted to consume her in turn.

now that she's gone... i'm starving.

and i'm tired, i'm so tired.  i can't rest without her soft breathing on my throat, i can't sleep without the warmth of her fragile body against mine.  the shallow rise and fall of her perfect chest, with its glassine surface and pillows of pure fucking freedom that waited for me, called to me, day in and day out, night after night after perfect, memorable night. 

i shouldn't be surprised that she's gone, because everything she did was like a memory waiting to happen.

every way she moved captured everyone around her, a flutter of angel wings waiting to be captured themselves.

captured by imaginations, by desires, by every wanting, wakeful eye that had the pleasure of misfortune of seeing them.

imogene was the kind of beautiful that broke your heart, the kind of beautiful that made you wish you were someone else.  someone better, someone stronger, someone more like she deserved.  but imogene, my imogene, my beginning, my end, she wasn't one to be predicted.  she deserved palaces.  her sweet angel kisses and her sweet angel sighs could tip the heads of kings, could have emperors craning their necks to hear her words.  instead she spoke to the degenerates, to the dregs of society, to me.

she had a smile like sunshine.  it broke through the clouds of whoever the fuck you thought you were and it warmed the coal your insides had become.  it coaxed and nurtured life from the impossible recesses of the jaded.  it melted the cold of all the years you knew before her and promised future, promised life.

obviously, it was a fucking liar.

because she's gone, and i'm alone, and without her...

i'm nothing.